Catching up
Well, a lot has happened since I've posted last. Alfonso and I decided to do another cycle with the remaining two embryos during the month of September. So I drugged myself up with lovely hormones and we prayed. Our transfer day was September 23. As we were pulling into the parking lot for the procedure, the embryologist called to let us know that our embryos had not survived the thawing process. We knew (in our minds) there was a good chance the embryos would not survive this process, but this news was so devastating to hear (to our hearts). So we went home:(
So I guess we are back to square one. We don't have any answers as to what we will do next. We don't know if we will know anytime soon. We do know that God is asking us to be patient and to trust His good plans for our family. So easy to type, yet so hard to live out on a daily basis. We are so grateful for His grace and strength.
The day before the transfer, God reminded me of Psalm 91:1-2. I remember reading it and thinking, "Yes, this is a good verse...but certainly Lord, I will get pregnant this time, right? I know I'll trust you in other things, but this trusting you for a baby will end." But God knew what the next day would hold. So of course, when things didn't go as planned, this was the first verse that came to my mind and I have been clinging to it ever since. When my heart hurts so deeply and I have no words, no answers and don't know what to do, I love to put myself in this verse and picture The Most High holding me as I rest in the shadow of the Almighty, I love to see myself in God's refuge, fortress.
He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, "He is my refuge and my fortress, My God, in whom I trust." Psalm 91:1-2
Posted in: on Tuesday, October 12, 2010 at at 1:47 PM 1 comments